1. I have really, really bad sunburn right now. (Happens every year, sigh) But I love outside SO MUCH, I can’t spend the next 5 months inside. /: I put on sunscreen, but seriously, it isn’t enough for how much time I spend outside. ugh.
2. I’m learning to crochet! I’m currently making a laptop envelope (:
3. Part of me is super glad I haven’t gotten a period yet, the other part of me wants it back so it’s easier to TTC. =/
4. I miss my husband.
5. I really, really like cheese.
We’ll probably wait until he’s done with school, and if it doesn’t happen this Summer, get him checked. (He graduates June 13th) For now, we’ve been cutting back nursing (feeding her more solid foods) in the hopes that it will bring my period/ovulation back to a normal cycle.
I’m just a little sad tonight. I miss my husband, I miss Darla. I miss my grandpa. I want more tattoos. I want to smoke a bowl. I want to finish my laptop sleeve. (I’m crocheting one - yay). I want to know what gender my sibling is going to be, so I can make him/her a blankey. I may just find a pretty green & yellow though.
I feel like everyone around me is pregnant.. Even those that don’t necessarily don’t want to be. I just want to be pregnant, to have another baby. Is that so much to ask? =/
I love my sweet Roran so much, but I want another baby! Honestly, if I don’t get pregnant before she turns 2, I’ll probably not have more children. ugh.
It hurts because I’m like the go to person for my friends… Breastfeeding questions for their newborn? They come to me. Pregnancy advice/support/whatever? They come to me. I love helping them, and I am so happy for them, but it makes me feel sick every time. Like “Why not me?” =/
Everyone tells me it’ll happen when it’s meant to, and that doesn’t really help me feel better. At all. We’ve been trying for almost 8 months, no dice. I AM still nursing Roran quite often, and that’s probably our problem, but neither Garrett nor myself can put our possibility of sterility out of our minds.. There is scar tissue in my uterus from my surgery, which I’m SURE makes it harder for eggs to implant, and Garrett mentioned he might be sterile! That is terrifying.. What if we just keep trying, thinking it’s because I’m breastfeeding then come to find out one of us sterile? What happens then? )’:
First time tandem wearing babies! They were a bit lower than I would like, but it felt awesome to be wearing two babies!
We went to Monkey Joes courtesy of my friend, Olivia, and had a blast.
Tomorrow, I’m finally getting my tattoo! :D
I think thats right
Tiffany pretty much turned into psycho bitch on me. Fuck her, and fuck the 60+ hour work weeks where I was only getting $80/week.
I, apparently, have entitlement issues and have lost her respect - wooptyfuckingdoo.
I’m not kidding with the “psycho bitch” part either. If you’d seen her messages, you’d understand..
I’m no longer a babysitter. Part of me is sad, part of me is going to miss that $80/week. BUT the biggest part of me is glad I’ll be able to focus more on my daughter. <3
My phone died last night, so my alarm didn’t go off for me to unlock the door for Tiffany to drop off Rain this morning… I woke up at 7am (an hour late), freaked out, checked my phone, and sure enough, it was dead… I put it on the charger, turned it on and checked my messages. Tiffany had messaged me like 4 times.. I sent her a message explaining what happened and apologizing.. She still hasn’t responded.
I think she’s mad at me, but I dunno what to do. It was an honest mistake.. and it wasn’t my fault. ):